The "SOME PEOPLE" Essays
The Weight of Family Silence Becomes Very Loud - The Pain of Invisible Illness by Evie Scarborough | Edited by Kimberly J. Soenen
(“Boundaries.” My sister, April 2018. Photo by Evie Scarborough.)
My sister struggled with depression and anxiety at the age of 13 years old. She began self-harm when she was 11 years old, and this took a horrible toll on me emotionally and physically.
Seeing how sad my sister was, and how she had chosen to cope with her illness in this manner, was emotionally taxing and draining. Choosing to cut, scratch, or burn your body seems to be an escape route, in the moment, from intense and horrible thoughts. It’s the preferred temporary, albeit ineffective, coping method for some people.
My family members made the best attempt to conceal and keep private the fact that this struggle was going on in our home. Family silence can become very loud.
My sister expressed to me that it felt as if she should be hidden because of her depression. She felt as if she were a burden. I managed my emotional response to her illness with photography. I set out to explore the emotional and physical boundaries people face through times like this.
I think my sister enjoyed taking part in these photos and the shoot enabled us to become closer. Spending more time with her is something I have tried to consciously do as a sister. I encouraged her to be productive, otherwise she could easily spend all day in bed or playing video games, growing bored or restless from ruminating, which, like a vortex, led to more self-harm.
Hiding and concealing illness can make people feel ashamed to ask for help and ashamed to seek help for a family member. The white cloth represents the ways in which society tears and constrains people who are suffering with invisible illnesses.
Upon reflection, looking back at these images, I feel sympathy and compassion, not only for my sister, but for everyone who has been through a tough illness or period like the one I survived with my sister. The experience with my sister has made me extremely mindful of what it requires to maintain her health and the health of my family—especially during stressful times in our lives.
Mental illness is isolating. The tension and strife in my images reflect the suffocating boundaries of mental health issues—both chronic or situational—but also raise the importance of well-being, acceptance, and a sense of belonging.
Feeling like an outsider, a burden or a problem can have detrimental effects on health in general. This can prove difficult to overcome, living in a world where mental health is often overlooked due to a lack of understanding.
Despite the fact that mental illness is a modern world epidemic, there remain extreme waiting lists for support and medical care everywhere. There are many barriers to medical care because of stigma and because of bureaucratic blockades. And medical care and counseling can also be cost-prohibitive.
A healthy mind is the key to a healthy body. As a society, we need to realize this and understand that we should take care of our own, and one another’s minds to maintain not only the health of the individual body, but also the body of society at large.
ABOUT
Evie Scarborough is an emerging photographer, writer and artist based in Peterborough, UK, focusing on social documentary to highlight issues in society that, in her view, are often invisible. Her series, Unconditional Love, centers on new living situations to combat loneliness. She is dedicated to focusing on mental health, nonhuman animals and their connection to human health and other cultural issues of the day. She also works in design, marketing and visual storytelling in a number of ways. Learn more about “SOME PEOPLE” and view the films here. Follow Evie here.